Calves! They're Everywhere!

Sunshine spilled over the mountain this morning. 

Cool mornings force us to use heat. 

Hot coffee awaits me as I stumble to the kitchen. 

I run the schedule through my head. 

I beat eggs and try not to burn toast. 
I burn eggs and the toast is safe. 

I continue the run through of the schedule. 

There's school work and book work. 

Calves need to be feed. 

Oh those calves! 

They're everywhere!

Calves always mean Spring here on the farm. 

The Winter is shedding it's skin. 

Milk production will return to a more comfortable place. 

The "hold your breath" feelings dissipate a bit. 

Cash flow begins to improve. 

This year, however, we are in the final stages of transitioning to Organic. 

This will complete a challenging year long process. 
Life is like that. 
Challenging. 
Needing to go the distance. 
We can't be sure what will happen. 
We can trust. 
Each calf that is born is a gift. 
New life. 
Some days the mama's do what they were created to do. 
There are no problems. 
Other days there is trauma and trouble. 
The outcome not so pleasant. 
Through each of those births my farmer waits patiently. 
He watches. 
He lets the mama's do their thing. 

Yet he is never far. 

It is the picture of our Holy God. 
He is never far. 
He waits.
Patiently. 

Genesis 28:15
I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until 
I have done what I have promised you."

A weekend Off

Bright sunshine greets the day. 

New babies. 

Warmth. 

Spring. 

It's finally arrived. 

The landscape a virtual palette; changing in moments. 

A gorgeous weekend. 

A gift. 

One in which we had off. 

Technically we have every other weekend off. 

Lately, each "weekend off," has been full. 

College visits, travelling. 

Taxes. 

Farm issues. 

But not this weekend. 

This weekend was a treasure. 

My farmer stayed close by. 

Trimming bushes. 

Raking the lawn. 

Cutting down trees. 

Beginning to take care of this beautiful place we call home. 

I brought him iced tea to drink. 

We chatted. 

We sat together in front of a bonfire. 

We picnicked together out on the rock enjoying the beautiful view. 

It was glorious and I am so grateful. 

These weekends "off" are a treasure. 

The pace seemed slower. 

The tension lifted. 

The financial stress pushed aside. 

The glaring imminent pressure for equipment to be ready, placed on hold. 

A glorious gift and sacrifice for my farmer. 

This little boost was much needed. 

We ended the weekend visiting friends and sharing a meal together. 

I Thessolonians 5:18

give thanks in all circumstances; 

for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

Developing eyes to see the beauty takes time. 

Effort. 

Marriage is hard work. 

Life is hard work. 

Holding on to Jesus every moment is hard work. 

Yet, as this work continues, grace abounds. 

And moments like this weekend happen. 

Eyes wide open. 

Seeing the grace. 

Appreciating the moment. 

As Spring continues to have it's affect on this beautiful landscape. 

I pray that you too will see the potential in each bud. 

There is hope. 

Isaiah 43:19

See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? 

I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.

Will Spring Ever Come?

My farmer and the crew work outside everyday. 

Sure they can head into the milk house to get warm. 

Sometimes they work in a tractor that has a cab.

Not sure if there is heat in there anymore. 

But mainly they are out doors. 

So, I hesitate as I choose my words; 

Will Spring ever come? 

The days are getting longer. 

Light in the early evenings. 

Yet, the cold lingers. 

I am not one to be cold. 

My internal system has always run on the warm side. 

But this year. . .

This year, I can not get warm. 

And it makes me dread the day. 

I can hear myself complaining. 

How easy it is to let the words flow. 

Listing the things that are not right. 

That could be better. 

If only.  . . 

Wallowing in the struggle in the path set before me. 

This is not how I want to live. 

I want the words that flow to be life giving. 

1 John 5:13

I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God 

so that you may know that you have eternal life.

When your thoughts are consumed by 

personal needs and the focus inward. 

There is little room for the Savior to work. 

So, I pray this scripture. 

2 Corinthians 10:5

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against 

the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

We need to surrender our thoughts and actions. 

Let them be made obedient to Christ. 

Seek words to encourage. . . not condemn. 

Live life so that a difference is made, each day. 

Spring will come when it is ready. 

And it will come. 

Until then my spirit needs to be open to the lessons 

that need to be learned in the Winter. 

The Season where much is happening that can not be seen. 

So in this restless place, I will put my trust in that which I can not see. 

I will look for words that breathe life and encourage. 

I will set my eyes on the eternal and not the temporal. 

It is the Lessons in Lent. 

The waiting. 

The hoping; for more. 

Anticipation that God is not done yet. 

And He's not. 

The best is yet to come. 

Lamentations 3:21-24

Yet this I call to mind

and therefore I have hope:

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,

for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion;

therefore I will wait for him.”

Holding On To Hope

The sun peaks through the clouds.

The air warm.

Such a contrast to the winter's relentless icy blast. 

The sounds of Spring cut through the morning stillness.

It is in these moments, each morning, that the strength for the day is nurtured. 

Dormant bulbs burst with the day's warmth. 

The gentle submission to the Father's will. 

The desire to seek obedience over sacrifice. 

We earn nothing. 

It is given. 

Freely. 

Ransom paid long ago for our souls. 

To be. 

To live. 

To have eyes to see the beauty when much has been wiped away. 

Each tender step; held.

Holding on to hope.

There's a gentle breeze and if you're still enough, it pours over the holiness meant just for the day. 

I Peter 5:7

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

The journey to the cross each day is not easy. 

He never said it would be. 

Through the pressing schedules and the demands of the day I will seek to let the breezes wash over me. 

My anxiety before Him. 

My steps ordered according to His will. 

My sight is limited. Bound by the shackles of this earth. 

The day is coming when those shackles will be loosed. 

And Glory will touch the earth. 

The day is before us. 

How will we impact our world? 

In what direction will be chose to walk today? 

Be thou my vision, oh Lord of my heart. 

Enjoy this link of a sweet sister in the Lord as she ministers musically with all that is within her.

Lori Jean Smith, Be Thou My Vision

How The Quiet Found Me

I sit on the rock.
I gaze out over this beautiful farm.

It's been months.

I haven't even wanted to venture outside. 

But today is warm. The wind is blowing and the memories strong.

The river rages with the ice cold mountain run off.
The expectancy of Spring in the air.
It is Holy Week.
The culmination of the Season of Lent.
These 40 days have gone so quickly.
How many days have I been still?
I haven't filled a bag in a week.
I have failed.
My expectations, not met.
A goal. Not reached.
I have let other things crowd the space.
 I wonder; what are those things? 
I have little to show for my time.
I have no tangible evidence.
That is the way it is with me.
I need to see the proof. 

I have no way to quantify if I have spent time learning to be still.
My bag a day gave way to doctors and cello; homework and dinners.
But before I write it all off as hopeless. 
I think about the time on the rock.

It was quiet. 
I found no need for words. 
It was just me. And the Creator.
I breathed in the deep earthy scent.
I gazed over winter's finality and the promise of spring.
I could hear the rage of winter's wrath in the river;
coursing and pressing the confines of the river path.
I felt the pressure of the wind as the gusts came.
And I felt the warmth of the sun after the stinging cold of a relentless winter.
This is what it means to be still. 
I sought this communion.
The weeks of purposefully seeking, has found me desiring the still.
Unconsciously I sought the stillness.
I went toward the quiet. 

Psalm 23:3
he leads me beside quiet waters,
     he refreshes my soul.

It didn't leave me uncomfortable.
My soul wrestled with the new grief before me.
The quiet; soothing and refreshing.
The journey through Lent may not have been perfect.
But the desire to still my aching soul is in process.
I long for the struggle to be over.
I long for the ache to disappear.

Habakkuk 3:19
The LORD God is my strength, and he will make my feet like hinds' feet, 
and he will make me to walk upon mine high places

But I am learning.
One moment at a time.
To surrender all that I am.
To seek the quiet. 
To rest in the presence of our Holy God.

Looking Forward To Spring

There is tension as we step towards spring. 

Equipment needs to be greased and oiled; repairs completed.

Yet there is snow on the ground and the tease of spring seems ages away; 

though it rests just around the corner.
All the while the daily milking and chores continue. 

The longer days give way to cold nights. 

Warm days and crisp nights brings the flow of sap. 

All of creation knowing what role it plays.

The cows are making less milk each day. 

This is a journey we take every year. 

Each cow needs a wee vacation before she calves.

It's about 45-60 days; their dry time.
I call it their spa vacation. Really it is.
Their job is to soak up the sun (when it shines) and eat and drink.
Really.
(sound nice?)
This is a tricky time.
 It causes our income to virtually be non existent.

This takes careful planning ahead of time. 

Bills will still need to be paid.

This is much like our walk on this earth. 

We need to be prepared.
The unexpected may happen at any time.
We need to be protecting our faith. Fellowshipping with other believers.
Daily reading God's word; 
those precious words that breathe life into us.
Sometimes they chastise and correct us.
But it is all part of the journey to be more like Christ.

II Timothy 3:16

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, 

rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness,

What steps do you need to take to be prepared? 

Each day will take careful planning. 

Expenses scrutinized. 

Anticipation mounting as calving time draws closer.

As I reflect on the winter and my farmer's journey with cancer. 

We need to praise God for the timing. 

For the winter; gave rest. 

It wasn't without it's trials

 But as new life pushes through the veins of the ordered world. 

So is new life pulsing through my farmer; as he gains weight and his strength returns. 

We will make a plan. We will look forward to spring. 

Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation,

 by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.