Most mornings I still wake with a longing for things to be different.
The piercing ache still very present.
Images of my red head running through my mind.
Reconciling the reality.
His life here, on this earth, finished.
My life continuing.
Striving to push against the tide that will threaten to pull me under.
2014 is coming to a close.
A year we battled cancer.
A year we walked on the wings of grace and mercy of friends and community.
A year where the God of the Universe never let us go.
A year where faith as small as a mustard seed grew as
the Ancient word spilled life into my weary soul.
A year where a little child led us.
With love never known before.
I don't have much to show for 2014.
I can't expound on great theological truths or fantastic accomplishments.
Most of it passed in a blur.
I can only say we made it through.
With grace, we placed one foot in front of the other.
We kept our feet planted.
We raised our hands to the living God.
And by His grace we are here.
Our souls are still weary.
The movement of our family still stilted as we carry on without one.
Yet, we long for all of this to bring us closer to the cross.
For all to know the power of the One who gave once. . . for all.
I can not bring Elijah back.
These pictures. . . .these pictures are all I have left.
I see my boy through videos or pictures.
And the memories etched forever in my being.
But I can shout from the mountain tops that He is with our Savior.
That his life was important because each and every day God deemed his steps.
We can look to the future because God calls us forward.
Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord.
Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.
Jeremiah was a prophet of the Lord.
Unfortunately, his job was difficult.
The words of his prophesy were devastating and depressing.
The nation of Israel would be sent into captivity.
The people long had been warned.
They needed to turn from their wicked ways.
But they couldn't.
The pull of temptation too great.
They would suffer the effects of the prophesy.
But see, the Lord didn't end the prophesy with doom and gloom.
He told those people to submit to the circumstances.
Walk into captivity.
Sometimes walking through the hard is what helps us see the good.
Because God is in the business of changing and restoring.
Jeremiah 29:14
I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile."
You see, even while the Israelites were in captivity,
God was doing a beautiful thing.
He was restoring a people.
A nation.
Our life circumstances can be hard.
2014 may not have been the best year for you.
Death, cancer, financial ruin may have been your path.
But God is in the wilderness with you.
He is doing a new thing.
Isaiah 43:19
See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up;
do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.
And while I long for Elijah and life before.
I am going to be open to see where God leads.
I will breathe deep the Ancient Promises.
I will declare the praises due His name.
My heart will be restored.
He will make my way.
Lauren Daigle
How Can It Be?
You plead my cause
you right my wrongs.
Have you read chapter 8 in Keller yet? I found it very hard but very good.
ReplyDeleteI haven't yet. I need to get back to reading it. I've been very horrible about reading lately. Just the Ancient Word. . .
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