What do we know about it?
Why is it so poo poo'd in the Medical Community?
If there are advances made with less invasive practices,
why are we not applauding and supporting these wonderful insights?
Why did my insurance coverage tell me that I could not give my son the prescribed medicine from the doctor; they would not cover it, it had to be a different medicine. The medicine made him dizzy and feel weird. This doesn't make sense. My doctor, who knows my son, knows what he needs, is not able to make the decisions of best care for my child. . .the insurance company is?
We sit in the doctors office.
Gary approaches the subject of Alternative Medicine.
It is heavy on his heart.
Is there another way out of this nightmarish treatment?
He researches and find there are other practices available with success.
Yet documentation is limited.
Accredited Journals, minimal.
Why is high end pharmaceuticals the only choice we have?
I hesitate to be a nay sayer.
For nine years, these high powered Pharmaceuticals keep mom alive.
Living a full life.
But could there have been another way?
We ponder these things as we hang in the balance, of intense radiation, combined with chemotherapy.
Radiation that will destroy salivary glands and hair follicles; leave possible teeth and gum issues, mixed with a cocktail of lethal drugs given in small doses to eradicate the cancer
that, in turn, may eradicate him.
These things are hard. But when you're still dealing with the loss of a child, a year on the farm unlike any other, and cancer. It is hard to make a decision.
Yet, all this is in the Palm of God's hand.
And for a few moments yesterday I forgot that.
I spewed to a sister in law.
I spewed to friends that brought dinner.
I left the well worn path of prayer and stepped for a moment into fear.
Into a place where there was no hope.
Sleep has a great way, for me, to wake with a fresh start.
When I wake the heaviness is still there, yet I feel stronger.
The reality that Elijah is no longer here, and my husband has cancer, comes rushing forward.
But the peace, that can only come through Christ, comes as well.
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
We have no solutions at the moment.
But God does.
He knows the path we'll take.
As we gather more information, we will be better informed. And we will be better prepared.
Day #21 of Thankfulness
I am Thankful for:
Lessons learned in quiet in the car
Chelsea and Lilah brightening our days
Watching Chelsea be a mom-such a beautiful thing
Memories of the kids all playing together
times for my faith to grow
Hospitals and the research being done
Access to Medical Care
dinners delivered to the door after spending the afternoon in the hospital
A cold bedroom and snuggling under all the covers ( have I mentioned I love going to bed)
Little girls who send me texts while they are upstairs, saying "Hi" and "I love you"
A new friend stopping at the door with a hug.
Notes and letters encouraging us on this journey and praying for complete healing
A new day
I will spend this day in prayer. I will rest this day in God's unfailing love and not look anywhere else for the comfort I seek.
We pray for your mighty hand to ease our suffering
. . . what if your healing comes through tears. . .
And what if trials of this life are Mercies in disguise. . .