Saturday, March 15, 2014

Falling In Love With My Farmer



About 23 years ago I fell in love with my farmer. His banjo playing, quiet ways, love for God and deep voice, was enough to make this city girl take a look at all she had thought would make her soul sing.The glitz and glam, nice cars, dinners out, fancy diamond studded jewelry (just kidding -but my birthstone is a diamond -lucky me) soon faded to what was real and what really mattered in


this world. A look deep into God's word and the Truth that rests there is what makes a girl really want to take notice. Wedding bells gave way to the rhythm of farming and teaching. The loss of our first child cemented our love and brought us to the edge of trusting. As each child was born, dating became creative and hospital visits were treasured memories. Time together was precious and took on a different meaning. Graduation and college with Chelsea and the change in the family structure further drew us together as I struggled to watch her go. We settled into a routine, often putting the kids needs before our own.When God allowed the unimaginable to happen we clung to the promises we knew. We stepped out on solid ground into grace. As we stood at the grave of our son, I held my farmers hand. That ginormous, rock solid hand. The hand that has loved me and loved our children. The hand that has milked cows, brought sustenance and life to the farm. We held hands that day and everyday since. We held hands when "in sickness" took on a different meaning. He looked into my eyes and I knew the diagnosis was cancer. We held hands and we knew even though it was 3 months into grieving our son; we would step out onto solid ground into grace.


And so we have treasured our vows, to have and hold
 And as depression threatens to steal his joy 
and I reel with the enormity of all that needs to be done.
 I hold his hand.
 I step onto solid ground and into grace. 

Psalm 26:12
My feet stand on level ground; in the great congregation I will praise the LORD.

This is one of the songs my farmer played that my heart surrendered and knew true earthly love.
I love this arrangement. 


4 comments:

  1. Beautifully expressed...His Love is your Love, and how wonderful that you and your sweet farmer have found that Love together! I continue in prayer for both of you, and am cheering for you, too! The Light will shine forth in the darkness...

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    1. Yes, we are blessed. It is not without its trials. Thank you for your words. We long for the light.

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  2. What a beautiful love you have. You are a wonderful witness to trust and faith. We pray for joy to overshadow that depression. You have no idea what a helpful role model you are to me as I struggle with mental illness in my own life. May God bless you all.

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    1. Thank you. Lifting you up with your struggle. May you walk in grace and feel the presence of the Holy Spirit in a mighty way. I will continue to lift you up.

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