The people of Egypt were willing to go back to the land of slavery: the very land that bound them. Back to the people that enslaved them and treated them cruelly. Rather than head into a new land, the promised land, with God.
It struck me. Am I willing to go into this new journey, unknown to me. . . with God; without Elijah?
Or do I want to go back and have Elijah with me?
These are questions that demand an answer. It will take time. Because in my flesh, I want Elijah back. I long to be with him. He's my son.
I find it again in a book I am reading. "Moses preferred to go nowhere with God than anywhere without him." (You'll Get Through This by Max Lacado.)
He's said it twice. In two different ways. I need to take notice. I know I prefer to go nowhere with God than anywhere without him.
If I am not going with God. Then I don't want to go anywhere. Where He is. I will be.
If that means without my son. Then I need to step forward in that. It doesn't say I have to like it. It doesn't say that I won't grieve with every fiber of my being. Because we are human. And grieving is hard work. Grieving your son, your flesh and blood. . . whom you carried for nine months. . . and now, torn from you is agonizing. It's twisted and hard to sort through. It leaves me raw, tired and spent.
I need to trust. I need to look forward to the future God has planned here.
Psalm 48:14
For this God is our God for ever and ever; he will be our guide even to the end.
Do you want to go nowhere with God, than anywhere without him?
I'd rather not think about it, thankyouverymuch. But I will.
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